Archive for September, 2009

Stop a Breakup? Stop the Negative Vibes

Sunday, September 20th, 2009

If you need to stop a breakup ASAP, you really need to dump the negative vibes even sooner.

Are you the sort of person who says phrases like “knowing my luck” or “that’s typical!” or “as usual” in a sarcastic or despairing tone when conversing with your partner?

In the same way that people would rather be right than be happy, we often have our default setting on the negative. It’s such an ingrained habit of ours to complain, we are totally unaware of how our behavior comes across to other people.

Even little remarks like that add to the mountain of negative comments we make a hundred times a day, and even others will not necessarily know what it is that puts them off us, but put them off us it does!

There is a reason for everything. So instead of just responding to stuff with a defensive knee-jerk reaction, ask yourself what the underlying reason could be.

Rather than look for the negative in life, your partner or whatever, discover the reason and accept it, or deal with it in a positive way.

If you oppose something, do so positively. Check out the difference between the following statements that could be spoken in any relationship:

“You see? This is the thing about you – you always do this! Every time I try to suggest something, you always have to ruin it by saying it’s a bad idea!”

or

“I understand what you mean honey, maybe it isn’t a practical suggestion for this week, but would you consider it for sometime over the next few weeks? If we do it, and you hate it, you can choose the next thing we do. How about that?”

The second response is not only non-accusatory, it is giving your partner a choice. Once they have a choice, they will feel more involved and be more open to your suggestions in future. Even if they don’t like your idea, they are much more likely to reason with you fairly about it.

So break up with the negative vibes, and not your partner!

Stop That Breakup with Your Boyfriend

Sunday, September 6th, 2009

Once your boyfriend breaks up with you it leaves an awful feeling especially if you do not want to let go of the relationship. You feel shattered, devastated, hopeless and heartbroken. It hurts so much that it seems as though it is paralyzing your life.

But don’t fear, for there is light at the end of the tunnel. If indeed you have truly found the one that you can build all your tomorrows with, then grab him back for there is still hope to bring back the joy of romance, start building your dreams together and fix your relationship.

But how do you stop a breakup with your boyfriend?

If your mind is in the state of feeling hopeless and you are on the verge of a breakup then remember that you can stop the breakup if you do things the right way. There is still a great chance that you become happy again in your relationship.

Each action you take should be planned, for a mistake could easily have a disastrous outcome. If not thought through properly, it could easily destroy your plans of stopping the impending breakup and being back in each other’s arms. But you must avoid at all costs panicking or appearing desperate. Yes, the fear of losing somebody can make you panicky. But you must control yourself so that this does not happen. It is a normal urge to beg him to stay, for you feel you need him, but portraying that kind of image will not help. Banish those panicky feelings for a while and clear your head.You cannot decide anything clearly if you are in panic mode. And your partner will not want to stay with you because he is sorry. Even if he does stay the relationship will still be doomed because he will just be pitying you.

If you want to save your relationship and you truly love him, you can do it by taking action. You need to have a proper plan and that’s what T Dub Jackson can provide you with in his inspiring book.